Blue Circle With A Line Through It

You were the best man I’ve ever dated, and you were the worst.

You will always be a thought in my mind as the person I will always wonder what could have been. I just know we would have been so happy.

What a terrible thing to do someone. Rarely you get closure but most the time we get to say goodbye. We get to understand it, as best we can, in that moment and walk away. You took that from us and that makes you a coward. By blocking us without a word, you took all the pain and gave it to us, so you wouldn’t have to feel any. You get walk around with your precious walls and blinders pretending we never even existed.

While we mourn in denial, bargaining, anger, depression, and working on acceptance.

The only funny part, the seriously hilarious part of all this, is we actually, for fleeting moments, blame ourselves.

The only time you suffer is when you have to look in the mirror.

Maybe one day you’ll spot us in a store and we will be happy without you. Having felt the pain of your disappearance and having moved on.

While you waded in grey waters, never dealing with anything, empowered by that blue circle with a line through it.

We will be fine. That’s the only justice here, we will fine. Because we loved fully, we have integrity, we have courage to face our demons, and try again. Try to trust another who also tells us “they’re are in it” that we have nothing to worry about and you aren’t going anywhere.

The beauty of this, we will move on. And when we find that right man willing and patient enough to show us real love we will love fully all over again and you may never. Always running from what’s real and sleeping ever so tightly with that blue circle with a line through it, your one and true and only friend.

The growth. Our prayers. I only pray that you can one day love yourself enough to change. That the next time you want to end things with someone you perk your tail up high walk over to their house, pick up the phone, exercise those thumbs and simply tell them. Let them say good bye, let them ask why, let them cry, and you walk away knowing that you are no longer a coward. You love yourself enough to want to look in the mirror and be proud of yourself, even though it hurt. You didn’t run, you were a good man. I deeply pray you find true love and hold onto it, treat it well, never take it for granite, and lose track of where that block button is in your phone.